BENDING into unusual positions for sex, getting caught bonking outdoors and flashing their boobs to a nightclub crowd –– these MILFs prove older can be better.
LOUISA: Being a former dancer, I can get into some pretty weird positions –– like putting my legs behind my head, which fellas seem to like. I’ve done that one loads. It’s served me well over the years. It really hits the spot –– my G-spot!
MARY: I quite like doggy style. I love it when my man takes ages to tease me and get me really wet. Then, if he stands by the bed and bends me over and slips his cock up me I’m in heaven. I also like the spoons position where I’m lying on my side and he’s on his side with his arms around me. It’s a special one for when I am freezing too and he can cuddle up to me. Or when you’re both tired and you’ve just woken up.
LOUISA: I don’t use toys. When I was younger, an ex got me a pocket pleaser but I lost it. My mum found it and asked me what it was. I said I thought it was a novelty pen! To be honest, it was too small –– you need something a bit bigger but I don’t want to play with toys when I can have the real thing. You’ve got a few haven’t you?
MARY: I’ve been to about five Ann Summers parties so I think you can guess the rest. My favourite is a Rampant Rabbit Deluxe model –– it’s a bit special. I’ve got to have the best of everything. I’ve got a selection, so many of them I can’t remember what they’re all called. And my fella loves playing with them too. He loves to tease my clit and pussy with them and watch while I play with myself too.And I like to tickle his balls and the bit between his cock and bum with them too. It makes him orgasm really powerfully while I’m sucking on his knob at the same time.
LOUISA: I’ve dressed up in a maid’s outfit once or twice. I wore it with frilly French knickers. From what I can remember, it didn’t stay on very long because my man ripped it off me in a fit of lust. Didn’t you have the same outfit?
MARY:Well, I always make an effort and dress for sex. I love expensive lingerie – basques, stockings and suspenders with high heels. But I thought the maid look would be perfect for our anniversary this year. It stayed on for the whole time we were f***ing too — mainly because I wasn’t wearing any knickers, so he had access all areas! It drove him absolutely wild.
LOUISA: I was in a club in town and they were having a shower night. I kissed a girl when we were under the shower –– getting wet all over –– and in the words of Katy Perry ‘I liked it’! There were loads of people watching too. The lads and some of the other girls in the club were taking pictures on their mobiles. I even flashed my tits to the crowd at one point! The organisers promised me a bottle of champagne if I kissed a girl –– so I did. It was such a laugh.
MARY: I did it a few years ago. It was an attempt to get this bloke away from me. It didn’t work though, he just loved it and looked like he was about to shoot his load so me and the girl I’d just kissed had to run for it. She was my best friend at the time –– so it was like kissing my mum on the cheek! We didn’t even bat an eyelid. That was my one and only time so, sorry boys, I am not a lesbian!
LOUISA: I think as long as it does the job and the sex is nice, it doesn’t matter how big it is. The largest I’ve had was about the size of a Wicked drink — but without the neck. I think a thicker dick is more important then length.
MARY: Considering your G-spot is normally only an inch and a half in, it shouldn’t matter how big he is. But you have to have the technique boys, to hit that spot. I’m a lucky girl because my fella has the skills to give me the thrills.
LOUISA: No, never tried it and I never want to because that’s a one-way exit in my book. As far as I am concerned, I’ve got a no-entry sign hanging over that hole.
MARY: I think we’ve agreed on something. I’ve never tried, although I had an incident once when he slipped out, but that was more of a “whoops where did that go?” If you want to do it up the bum boys, buy a blow-up sheep.
LOUISA: I’ve done it on a pool table,by a public paddling pool and in a hot tub. But I think doing it in a leisure centre changing room was the most public. Someone could have walked in and caught us at any moment. What about you?
MARY: It has to be at a petrol station. I got hold of his nozzle and he pumped me hard from behind! You could say the place fuelled our passion, ha ha. It was also quite romantic because he put his jacket on the ground for me and I really love the smell of petrol too!
LOUISA: No, I haven’t because you can never find the right people. It would have been too weird to do it with any of my boyfriend’s mates. Although I would rather do it with two boys and get a proper filling!
MARY: Yeah, girls are fine to talk to in the toilet — but not to shag. I have never had a threesome and never want to.
LOUISA: I’ve been bonk busted –– it was at the paddling pool. One warm summer’s night, me and my ex were on our way home from town. We got caught right in the middle of it with our trousers round our ankles. All I heard was my boyfriend’s mate shout, ‘look who that is on the floor’. I was drunk at the time and it was at night. I was glad it was someone I knew and not a stranger.
MARY: I’ve been lucky I think, but I’m sure that luck will probably run out sometime soon. Now I come to think of it, the petrol station probably had CCTV everywhere and it’s right next to a pub — maybe we weren’t so lucky!
SPIT OR SWALLOW?
LOUISA: I’ll do both but recently I’ve been swallowing because his juices tastes fine, not quite as nice as ice cream but I don’t mind. I told him I would swallow because I really like him. If I spat it all out he would think I didn’t. It shows he’s close to my heart!
MARY: I’m sorry, but that’s just stupid. I could think of plenty of other ways to show a bloke I like them. I spit all the way. I swallowed once on request but it left a bad taste in my mouth for a week.
LOUISA: I would love to be on a desert island with just a big, strapping bloke, a survival kit and lots of alcohol. The kit would contain one pack of cigarettes for him, headache tablets for the hangover and some chewing gum for my breath after all the swallowing I would have to do.
MARY: I’d love to spend 24 hours in bed with my fella. We’d have sex all round the house and only take a break for sex snacks and Corrie.Then again, he could always shag me hard from behind while I watch TV – no need to stop!