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I’LL BEAT MAGALUF GOBBLE GIRL’S RECORD

A 71-YEAR-OLD great grandmother last night announced her intention to BEAT Magaluf Blowjob Girl’s 24-man MEGANOSH.

GIRL’S CAT SEX REVENGE ON LOVE CHEAT

THEY say revenge is a dish best served cold. But Dave Foster knows to his cost that revenge is more effective when served 40 feet above one of the country’s busiest trunk roads.

FISHERMAN CAGED FOR TRANNY HORSE SEX

A FILTHY fisherman with a penchant for TRANNIES has been jailed after police found a stash of extreme porn – showing shemales having sex with HORSES!

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BODY OF HIDE-AND-SEEK CHAMPION FOUND IN CUPBOARD

Alan was son of 1995 champ – who was ALSO found dead in closet!

DID FRED FLINTSTONE GO DOGGING?

NEWLY discovered cave sketches prove that prehistoric man enjoyed DOGGING sessions with Neanderthal neighbours!

HAS KIM GOT A BIG UN?

NORTH Korean dictator Kim Jong Un has undergone a complex PENIS EXTENSION operation which has left him HOBBLING in pain.

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